masterchief, as far as your 21 and 1911, most .45 loaded 200gr and heavier is subsonic. i use my standard plinking load out of my .45s and they work fine.
im running 230gr cast lead over bullseye (5.0gr).
jacketed factory stuff works fine too.
as for subsonics in an AR(i'm assuming you are chambered in .223/5.56), well, they won't cycle. you will turn your SBR into a straight pull bolt action. I've done some up for kicks, but its just expensive .22 that takes up handloading time. (I'm not going to publish the load I use. A "safe" load using unmodified brass can be found on the Hodgdon website.)
you can buy factory subsonics from Engle Ballistics and other companies. It isn't much of a benefit in a rifle. just shoot full power and deal with the crack (assuming your SBR barrel is long enough to comply with suppressor warranty strictures).
just my .02. pm me if i've confused more than i've helped.