9 year old in cuffs?

[dbh]

so this is an interesting story and im not sure how i feel about this, and i need some advice and please pass this around, my 9 year old step son put a knife in his book bag over the weekend one that he found in his grandfathers junk drawe it was an old timer with a 2 inch blade (which he shouldent have been touching in the first place and he knows this) so he got to day care today at his tae kwon do place and found it in his book bag so he took it out and put it in his cubby (now mind you no one there cared i asked them to look for it and they did find it and no other words were said he told them what happened and they noted it was a mistake on his part) in the course of doing this a class mate witnessed this happen. when they got to school this classmate told the teacher that he had this knife at day care which is not located on or even near the school grounds. befor myself or my wife was contacted. he was sent to the princaple there they told him that if it happened again he was going to be suspened then brought in the sheriff and told him that if it happened again he was going to be put in cuffs and arrested , my first general reaction was to flip out but i know its not relaly going to solve anything so im here loking for advice on how to hadle this because i felt they did a very poor job on there part any adivce would be greatly apperciated

 

[Bikebreath]

theywerejusttryingtoscarehim

 

[teratos]

so this is an interesting story and im not sure how i feel about this, and i need some advice and please pass this around, my 9 year old step son put a knife in his book bag over the weekend one that he found in his grandfathers junk drawe it was an old timer with a 2 inch blade (which he shouldent have been touching in the first place and he knows this) so he got to day care today at his tae kwon do place and found it in his book bag so he took it out and put it in his cubby (now mind you no one there cared i asked them to look for it and they did find it and no other words were said he told them what happened and they noted it was a mistake on his part) in the course of doing this a class mate witnessed this happen. when they got to school this classmate told the teacher that he had this knife at day care which is not located on or even near the school grounds. before myself or my wife was contacted. he was sent to the principle there they told him that if it happened again he was going to be suspended then brought in the sheriff and told him that if it happened again he was going to be put in cuffs and arrested , my first general reaction was to flip out but i know its not really going to solve anything so I'm here looking for advice on how to handle this because i felt they did a very poor job on there part any advice would be greatly appreciated

I'd write a letter to the principal cc'd to the school board about the situation. They have no business threatening your child because of what he does off school grounds. Then I would make sure he NEVER brings a knife to school.

 

[StantonCree]

They probably said that to scare him into not doing it again. Imagine being 9 and the police telling you they were going to arrest you, you wouldn't want to engage in that behavior again.

Idle threats sir are sometimes very effective. Sounds like the officer did his job.

EDIT: After re-reading sounds like the school over reacted.

 

[Indiana Jones]

They probably said that to scare him into not doing it again. Imagine being 9 and the police telling you they were going to arrest you, you wouldn't want to engage in that behavior again.

Idle threats sir are sometimes very effective. Sounds like the officer did his job.

Agreed

 

[teratos]

They probably said that to scare him into not doing it again. Imagine being 9 and the police telling you they were going to arrest you, you wouldn't want to engage in that behavior again.

Idle threats sir are sometimes very effective. Sounds like the officer did his job.

The school had no business commenting on it at all. He did this off school grounds. Granted, it sounds like he had the knife at school, but they can't prove it.

 

[fivepointstar]

from what you described I don't believe it was a school matter. I use to be a SRO and the schools case against your son lacked any merit IMHO. If they found the knife in his possession, that's one thing. But I think a simple phone call would regarding the incident would have sufficed.

One thing i learned is School Admn in the elementary schools have the tendency to over react. This is MY OPINION!!! as School Admn gets to Middle school and even HS, they are better when it comes to disicplinary issues just because they deal with it on a daily basis. The ES deal with discipline far less.

how would I address it?? I know how I would address it if it was my child based on my experience. I'm friends with the HS and MS principle so they know me pretty well, i don't ever forsee and issue with them.

 

[Half-cocked]

The school had no business commenting on it at all. He did this off school grounds. Granted, it sounds like he had the knife at school, but they can't prove it.

Komrade, EVERYTHING you do during your personal time is the government's business!

Hail the Nanny!

 

[itsslow98]

Can't say I blame them really, daycare or school are no place for a 9 year old to bring a knife. If he took it to daycare they probably saw no reason he wouldnt bring it to school. Id just leave it be and use it to educate him. I see nothing beneficial of going to the school board.

 

[Seagrave1963]

What was your step-son's reaction to the "meeting" with the principal and Deputy? Do you think he will think twice about getting into Grandpa's junk drawer? If so, a life lesson early. God knows we'd like our children to do the right thing but they have to learn and we (the parents/step-parents) aren't always next to them each minute.

Not a soapbox about parenting just pointing out that the kids can learn (good or bad) from others and it's OK to build on the good lessons.

(.... and it ain't the extreme of "it takes a village...." crap! )

 

[K31]

Tell your kid he is not in trouble (any further trouble after the dojang that is). Explain to him how school officials are under enormous pressure due to school violence and that is what provoked the Principals response.

 

[jtb81100]

If it was my kid:
1. Loss of TV/xbox/ds/whatever for a few days for taking the knife in the first place, and an explanation of why it is such a serious issue for the school
2. Have a meeting with the admins asap to tell them that I would expect an immediate phone call anytime there was a serious issue concerning my child

If he didn't have the knife on school property, I would definitely complain to the board. Yes they have an obligation to investigate and make sure a weapon isn't on school property, however they have no right to threaten your child when he has broken no school rules. If the LEO cuffed him (which the thread title makes it seem), I'd complain to the department as well. If all he did was explain what would have happened if the knife had been on school property, I have no problem with it (assuming he wasn't acting unprofessional or treating your kid like scum).

Now, if the knife WAS on school property I'd be thanking them for NOT over-reacting and having him arrested and suspended, although I would make it clear that I would have expected to have been brought into the loop long before threats were made.

Between typing my thoughts and this, I called my mom who is an ES admin to get her thoughts. They pretty much mirrored mine, although she did say if it had been me she would have told the cop to cuff me and put me in the car until she got there to let me think about it.

 

[-Z/28-]

Like others have said, schools have a zero tolerance police when it comes to weapons. If he'd have actually had the knife on school grounds, they would have suspended him. They don't care if it was an accident or not. The problem here is little tattle tale who knew he didn't have the knife anymore, but no doubt mouthed off anyway just to get attention.

 

[teratos]

Like others have said, schools have a zero tolerance police when it comes to weapons. If he'd have actually had the knife on school grounds, they would have suspended him. They don't care if it was an accident or not. The problem here is little tattle tale who knew he didn't have the knife anymore, but no doubt mouthed off anyway just to get attention.

You're right. I would tell my kid to knee-cap the kid who told.

 

[StantonCree]

The school had no business commenting on it at all. He did this off school grounds. Granted, it sounds like he had the knife at school, but they can't prove it.

I edited about the school thing but otherwise still stand by my police's response.

 

[hvymax]

Like others have said, schools have a zero tolerance police when it comes to weapons. If he'd have actually had the knife on school grounds, they would have suspended him. They don't care if it was an accident or not. The problem here is little tattle tale who knew he didn't have the knife anymore, but no doubt mouthed off anyway just to get attention.

You're right. I would tell my kid to knee-cap the kid who told.

Snitches like that need stitches.
I was always nervous about this because as a scout my son was allowed to have and use knives in every aspect of his life exept school from the age of 8 or so. I carried knives to school from 5th grade or so and it was no big deal. In high school shooting team members and hunters had guns in their cars and in the school building.
The problem is schools disciplining decent kids for no malevolent actions. They refuse to do anything about violent predators and drug dealers but much like in society these days let the peacable citizen make the slightest infraction no matter how inadvertant and they will be crucified. This is the real problem.

 

[teratos]

Snitches like that need stitches.
I was always nervous about this because as a scout he was allowed to have and use knives in every aspect of his life exept school from the age of 8 or so. I carried knives to school from 5th grade or so and it was no big deal. In high school shooting team members and hunters had guns in their cars and in the school building.
The problem is schools disciplining decent kids for no malevolent actions. They refuse to do anything about violent predators and drug dealers but much like in society these days let the peacable citizen make the slightest infraction no matter how inadvertant and they will be crucified. This is the real problem.

"Zero tolerance" policies reflect our society in general these days. No thinking is necessary...

 

[fivepointstar]

if the child is charged/arrested theres nothing wrong with putting cuffs on the kid. Thats what happened when someone gets arrested. Child can be charged at 8+ with a crime.

 

[hvymax]

if the child is charged/arrested theres nothing wrong with putting cuffs on the kid. Thats what happened when someone gets arrested. Child can be charged at 8+ with a crime.

The problem is that it would even be considered for a peacable student at all. This is what we have degenerated to!! Punish the peacable while the violent predatory animals run wild! No wonder so many have lost all faith whatsoever in the system and its minions.

 

[fivepointstar]

The problem is that it would even be considered for a peacable student at all. This is what we have degenerated to!! Punish the peacable while the violent predatory animals run wild! No wonder so many have lost all faith whatsoever in the system and its minions.

Why??? its an arrest? People under arrest should be handcuffed (in not disagreeing, playing devil's advocate).

Also, tHe Violent Preditory Animals should also be punished